Y'all come back now, ya hear?

Remember the Beverly Hillbillies? Remember how Ellie Mae had her "critters"? Okay, do you remember Bessie, the chimp? Bessie was a little mischievous. I remember all this so well, because I now live with Bessie the Chimp. Today has been one of those days that I dread like a root canal.
She awoke at 7ish "clicking" through the house. That dang cane clicks so loud sometimes. I tried playing sleep, but after her third round through my bedroom, I got up. Once again, I remind you....I do not talk in the mornings for at least one hour. She starts, "Could I have a cup of coffee??" I begin fixing it, even before my Diet Dr. Pepper! But still, no talking. She asks again, "Hon, may I have a cup of coffee?" "imfixnit" I mumble. "What???" she says. I just continue with no response. She lays her head on the table and falls in and out of sleep. I decide to go ahead and make her oatmeal. (Note: if she'd have let me get up first and gotten awake, I'd have made muffins) She jumped and hollered when I closed the pantry door. I am not affected in the least. She begins to apologize for waking me up. I mumble, "okay", but continue moving like a robot. That isn't enough....she says it over and over. "Honey, I'm sorry. I hate to wake anybody up". "Forgive me, hear? (actually comes out he-uhn)" Still, I am nodding and getting her breakfast ready. "What's today?" she asks. "Where's Kerry?" "Where's Becky?" She was so confused. She thought it was like 4 in the afternoon because it was so dark and dreary out. Then....then...she got into my crochet thread. She rambled through my mail. She opened Christopher's package from NSA. I thought she was going to wear his cap (umpire). She got into the "yard sale" stuff. Finally, she went to the couch and sat for a few minutes. Then she got into Rebekah's things (posters and such from plays). She opened my china cabinet. She rearranged my "whatnots" as she calls them in the living room. I went into her room to put up laundry, and found that she had taken my sewing and craft things and put them all over her room. Now she'll take your things in a heartbeat if she so desires. She has been BUSY BUSY BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! At supper tonight, she asked Rebekah if she'd gained weight. Rebekah just said that she had to shut her up (she hoped). Then she said, "Well I knew you didn't use to be so fat." PRECIOUS BESSIE PRECIOUS!!! She may be bound for the nursing home if I have to endure another day like today!