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Friday, June 27, 2008

Traveling to a galaxy far far away....

In the morning I will be boarding a plane for San Antonio, Texas. I have never been to Texas, but have 2 internet friends from Texas. They have both warned me that it is major hot! I will be attending NECC (National Education Computing Conference) with my friend Jenny from the school system. She has to hold my hand, I don't fly well. So....a short post tonight before I hit the sack.
Moma has been totally crazy today. I mean, CRAZY!!!!!!!! She has been edging that way for the last 2 days, but she landed today. She got up and was rambling in the fridge before I could get up from the computer and get to the kitchen! Remember when she is crazy, she walks very well, rarely uses her cane, and is very "smart" to put it mildly. Her new question for everything I tell her is "How do you know?" She has tried to call Sherry all day about money. She wants her money! She needs her money! She has wagged her wallet in the pocket of her housecoat all day. In fact, she is asleep with it in her pocket. She has renamed Rebekah....she is Diane. I washed her houseshoes because she got blood on them, and she is trying to call "that womarn who took her shoes home with her to wash". She wants a telephone in her room in case she needs to call someone. It's like she is going through the terrible twos! You no sooner get one fire put out and she has started another one (figurative speaking, that is). She has been in to something all day.
I am worn out. If I didn't know better, I'd think I might sleep on the plane tomorrow. But I know better, and so does Jenny!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

He said, she said.........

I have the most asinine conversations now. And the truly sad thing is they are completely normal to me. Yesterday, Moma got up from one of her naps, came into the kitchen and said, "Where is Rosabell?" referring to her older sister who has been dead at least 10 years. As natural as could be, I paused my conversation with Rebekah, and looked at her and said, "in Heaven with Jesus", and went right back to my conversation with Rebekah.

Also yesterday, she rode with me to Southside. We took a shortcut through Whorten Bend. She said, "What do they call this down in here?" I answered "Whorten Bend". Within that short ride (15-20 minutes or so), I counted how many times she asked that....are you ready???? 10 (sigh)

We argued today about what clothes she was going to wear to the beauty shop tomorrow. I told her repeatedly that we had decided on the green suit. She said, "which green suit?" I said, "Moma, we have had this conversation several times already!" She stomped off saying, "I have got more than one green suit". SHE DOES NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On a sad note....my 14 year old cat, Emily, died today. She was mentally retarded (seriously), but she was the sweetest cat I have ever had.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Smell like a dog?

Yesterday, I came in from school (weekend college) and found out that my son's car (which is for SALE by the way....) was ready to be picked up from the mechanic. So, Kerry and I talked Moma into taking a ride and going with us, because to be honest....who's wants her HOME ALONE? She loves to ride if she doesn't have to get out of the car. She was so cute and funny. We rode by some relatives' homes and she knew who lived there. She waved at her house and said, "Hello old girl". We really enjoyed her. (Enter shark music) When we got home, her horns sprouted and she was a terror! She complained about the fan, the air conditioner, feeding the dogs, wanting some candy, not having enough diapers to get through the night....and on and on. I was so ready to go to bed. As I was going through the house turning off lights, she appeared in the door with the dreaded words......................
"SCRATCH MY BACK"
Oh the misery. You would have to experience it to understand why I hate this so much. So I get the back scratcher (because I have NO nails) and we go through the ritual. (gag) And I put her to bed. I just get laid down when Rebekah bursts through our bedroom door laughing hysterically.
She said, "Mom, she has the dog shampoo between her feet in the bathroom, I think she is putting it on her bottom". Fudge! I get up, go into the bathroom and there is my grandmother slathering up her legs with my dog's $11 a bottle shampoo. I said, "MOMA! That is dog shampoo (and I don't even mention the cost!) you are rubbing on your legs". She said, "I don't give a shit what it is. It is stopping my itching, and nobody else is doing anything about it." And it probably was. It is oatmeal shampoo I buy at the vet for Shula's dry skin.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Catch up time

Wow! I haven't posted in nearly a week! My loyal readers must be wondering what has happened! My loyal readers total 3, maybe 4. lol



A few evenings ago, I was coming out of the bathroom (which is next to Moma's bedroom), and I heard her say, "Stan' up! Stan' up all of you!". Now this caught my attention as I love her sleepy time talks! (I especially have fond memories of the family reunion one, scroll back if you haven't read that entry). I listened a few minutes when I realized that she was having school, but I still haven't figured out her roll. She was not the teacher or the principal, but yet, I am not sure she was a student either. Needless to say, I ran down the hall to get Kerry. As we hurried back, we had to assure Tubby (the dog) that we were not going to hurt her, he was about to bark and stop all the fun! This is what we heard: ...the order may not be right, but you'll get the idea

Stan' up! Stan' up all of you!

This beats all I ever seen. (mumbled something)

Teacher! I want you to put a D on ever one of their cards!

You're ruining your schooling is what your doing! (mumble)

Well, I'll just ask the principal. (mumble)

Sit down! Sit down! SIT DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1...2....3...SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do we have any volunteers?

(lots of mumbling)

I ain't never seen such!

It was so precious! We were in that hallway laughing so hard but holding it in. It was like getting tickled in church.

Yesterday, she woke up the sweetest, most humble, passive little old lady. She wasn't grunting or growling. She was smiling that sad lost smile. She ate her breakfast in silence. When she finished, she looked up at me (sitting next to her struggling with a statistics problem) and said, "Are we any kin?" God love her. So we conversed about our family, and I had to remind her that she knew that her sisters were dead, and yes, she had attended their funerals. But then, she talked about Grandpa being such a good daddy. I have never in my 49 years heard that. We were discussing that she hides her money and then forgets where she hid it. She said she got that from her momma, that she hid money from Grandpa, because he drank so much. Then again, she proceeded to tell me what a good daddy he was. She did not give a lot of details but I have never heard her say he was a good father. Only how much she loved him. Of course, the princess reign actually began with Grandpa and her brother Charlie.

I have a personal favor for my devoted readers and friends. Please pray about a situation that I cannot go into great details about in this public forum. All I can tell you is the word attitude. And no, not mine. Thanks!

It's weekend college weekend, so I may not check back in for a day or two. Have a great weekend!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

Moma's oldest son was my daddy. He was born September 15th, 1928. He would be 80 years old now. He was very important to the girls in his life. His grandma (my great, Moma's mother) was a driving force behind him. He loved her better than life itself. She prayed for his salvation. She must have been precious. I wish I could have known her. His mother, my Moma, was very important to him. He loved her very much and felt he needed to protect her and take care of her, especially after my Papa died. She leaned on him for everything! Then, my precious Mother loved him so very much. He was her life. She adored him. You could see her eyes light up when he came into a room. Finally, his daughters feared him, but in a good way. We knew he meant business, but that every demand he put on us was for our own good. We adored him! He was always FOR us! He raised me at Auburn football games, Emma Sansom High School sports (his alma mater and mine). When I found out I was pregnant the last time, all he said was "I want a girl". I gave him one. He was so proud of our little Rebekah. The day she was born, he went to a florist and had a special pink bow made for my door, because the ones at the hospital were not special enough! She was the last girl in his life. God called him home Oct. 22, 1990. She was 5 months old. I could not let this day pass without reflecting on my precious Daddy. I love you and miss you so very much! Because education was so important to you for us, I have dedicated my higher ed. to you. I use my maiden name as part of my legal name in your honor. I love you Daddy, and I am sorry I didn't tell you enough.

Moma has been so mobile and rambling for the last 4 days that I am about to go crazy! So today, when she asked for her daily request of Tylenol, I gave her a sleeping pill (calm down, a very mild one). She slept all of 20 minutes! Sigh........................the sitter comes tomorrow.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Happy Birthday

This was worthy of a post all by itself. Today is Moma's 95th birthday! Although she really didn't feel up to par, she turned 95 today regardless. She got a "Listenup amp" to help her with TV watching and a new pair of house shoes. We had lunch from Uncle Sam's. She didn't feel like going out, so I went and got it. For the most part, she was a really good girl, passive and gentle.

Happy Birthday Moma! Thank you for all the times you kept me when Momma was working. Thanks for taking me to piano lessons, picking me up from school, and teaching me to iron. Thank you for teaching me to shoot basketball, pitch a baseball, shoot marbles and jump rope. Thank you for loving me and being so patient with me when I was most unlovable and unkind. For all life's lessons, I am grateful. I learned by your example to be loving and giving. I watched you pick up little old lady after little old lady and take them to church. We took your sisters, 2 who could not drive, to pay bills, go to the cemetery, and out to eat. You made sure that I had Jesus in my heart, and constantly reminded me to keep my sins under the Blood. For all the songs we sang and all the games of Old Maids we played, I am thankful. Thanks to your example, I love animals of all kind and flowers and plants. I finally learned to crochet, even though you couldn't teach me because you are left handed and I am right handed. You turned me on to Dr. Pepper. You bought me a Madam Alexander doll (which I still have) and my first watch (Cinderella), which I also still have. And for my high school graduation, you bought me the most beautiful dinner ring. You have always been there for me. I want to be there for you now in your time of need. Forgive me when I don't live up to your par. You are my example.

Grace and Frank

Growing up with Moma's stories of her childhood is one of my most precious memories. I would beg her to tell stories on her front porch. Later she got a swing, but when I was younger, she only had rockers. We'd sit in those rockers for hours playing "Doodlebug" and drinking ice water (not iced water, ice water). She'd begin telling things from her childhood, and we'd laugh and laugh. She was a stinker! In fact, she still is!
One of my very favorite stories is about Aunt Grace and Uncle Frank. Aunt Grace was the 2nd oldest sister to Moma (she was the baby). As you know, they married very young back then, and I think Aunt Grace was about 14 when she married Frank. Well anyway, Frank would take Aunt Grace up to the mill store and buy her candy and ice cream. Moma tells how cheap candy was then and how much a nickel would buy. They would "trapse" back home and lock themselves up in the back bedroom to eat their ice cream and candy. Moma talks of begging to get into their room; beating on the door with both fists and screaming at them to let her in. She would always end this story by saying how stingy and hateful Aunt Grace was and how she hated Frank. Uncle Charlie (her brother) would always come to her rescue by dragging her away from their door and taking her to the store himself. This was the beginning of her reign as the forever princess.

This story has just recently come to life again. We have begun to hide to eat candy or treats. We hide food in strange places to keep Moma out of it. If she sees you come in with candy or cookies, she'll start hollering, "What's that?" and "Gimme some". She doesn't mind taking your candy, cookies, food of any kind...in fact, she'll drink from your drink. It is so funny, because even at 95, she is begging for candy and ice cream and calling us hateful. Only difference is Uncle Charlie is long gone, and there is no rescue in sight.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

YES!!!

Interviewed a sitter today, and I think she is THE ONE! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She seems down to earth and has a good personality. She is going to do trial basis this summer and then take over in the fall, if it all works out, and I do not see a problem!! I am so happy! My kids will be too! My husband will be happy if I am happy!
See me smile.
See me smile and relax.
Laugh, laugh, laugh.
See me go shopping.
See me go shopping and not have to beg someone to babysit.
See me enjoy life again.
See me smile.
Smile, smile, smile.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Dying

This morning at 6:30 am, Moma called me into the kitchen (mind you, she is NEVER awake at 6:30). She said, "I'm a dyin'". Now I have heard this speech before, but you would not believe how clear she talks when she gives this speech. I said, "You are?" She kept saying, "It's awful..." but I just humored her because like I said I have heard this before more than I want to. This time though, she told me that God had revealed it all to her. She jumped around so I never quite got the gist of what was going to happen to her, but something is, according to her. I told her that she must have had a bad dream, but she wouldn't have it. Then she begged me to find all her people and make sure that they are ready to meet the Lord, because that is all that is important. And she kept asking me if I was ready. I assured her that I was, so then she began telling me that she wanted to have all her family in Heaven with her. I tried to tell her that she was healthy, but she said that didn't matter according to what she had seen last night. Personally, I think she was reliving that awful night in November, but that never came up. I tried putting a positive spin on it by telling her that Heaven is a grand place, and dying would not be bad because she would be perfect and have NO psoriasis! She wouldn't have it. She kept saying she was so nervous. She finally went back to bed. But..................guess what?
MILDRED WOKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, June 8, 2008

When will the rambling end??

I am about to go crazy with her in rambling mode. She opens mail, reads my "to do" list, goes through my groceries, rambles in drawers, digs through my Avon books and stuff. I am going to her house as soon as I get a relief moment, and bring her some "stuff" to do. I think I'll bring all her old receipts and bills statements, and the funeral home stuff and cards from my grandfather's death, and maybe some drawer contents and tell her to weed out what she doesn't want. She needs to leave my things alone! I have finally put all mine and Rebekah's things from the bathroom in the closet and locked it. The only thing on the counter is stuff she can mess in. I have had to throw away expensive creams and lotions that she has used on the south end of her. Yes, she will put any random product on her hind quarters when she feels the urge. She is cussing on a regular basis and will drop the sh*# bomb in a minute! She also feels the need to discuss her toileting habits with anyone who happens to be in the house; family, company, UPS man....
I guess the funniest thing she has done in rambling mode is when she came to get me about the boxes that Rebekah had packed to take to college. She had printed BEK in big letters in permanent marker. Moma said, "These boxes say that you are supposed to deliver them to Belks Department store". I said, "No Moma, they say BEK". She said, "Well, maybe she is supposed to deliver them to Belks". She's killing me..............

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Final word

Just a final word......
after the big deal over Wendy's, she told my husband that she had always loved candy growing up, and that she told me to buy her some candy, and that I just laughed in her face. I am guessing this happened in a twilight zone, because I have never heard that. And why is she on my case, HE brought in the bag from Wendy's with nothing in it for her!
Oh well.....

Liar Liar, pants on fire....

The whole weekend so far has been just precious. Moma is most certainly MILDRED, but, not the one that raised me, the most recent Mildred (of the past 5 years). She has rambled in every drawer, sack, closet, box, purse, cabinet, and hole she could get in. She has had a record number of "boo boo" accidents, and done a fair share of cussing too. I have called her Ramblin' Rose, but that makes her so mad. The funniest thing is how greedy she is about food.
Today at about 3ish, she started nagging me about supper. When I would ask if she was hungry, she'd say, "no, I just wondered". Finally, she came through,disgusted, and said to me, "They said we was gonna have supper, but I'll believe it when I see it." It was about 5:30 (and the no less than 12th time she'd mentioned supper). So, I reminded her that Kerry would be bringing supper home, when he came home, and could she not wait? She said she could, but would not hush about eating. So, I offered her some chicken soup. She said it was better than nothing so I fixed it. She ate the whole bowl. In the meantime, Kerry called to say he was going to get our supper and who all was eating. I told him that she had already eaten, to just get us something. Just about the time she finished up, and was putting her bowl in the sink, he came in with a big sack from Wendy's. She said, "There he comes with our supper!!" Without going into the much repeated and irritating dialogue that transpired, just be assured that she was highly ticked off that there was nothing for her in that bag. As we sat down to eat, she kept tryng to get into the bag as I was getting our food out. Then she stood between us while we began eating doing her usual grunting. I was not ugly, but I said, "You can sit with us at the table or you can sit in the den, but you are not going to stand over me while I eat." She said, "Well, pardon me" very sarcastic like. She said again, "I didn't want anything anyway", so I said, a little loud perhaps, "You could not wait on him to bring our supper home, you had to eat, so you ate! That was YOUR choice!!!" She leaned over to my ear as if to tell me a secret and said as hateful as ever, "Why don't you shut up lying?" (her pronunciation is shet-up)
I'd like to see a show of hands of who wants to trade places with me.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Mildred

Just a quick entry.....
Today, Mildred woke up. So, needless to say, we have argued and fussed most of the day. Thank goodness I have school this weekend and she'll be Sherry's (a.k.a. Dorothy) problem. If she wants a fight....Sherry will give her one! lol
I'm hoping Millicent will return soon. And maybe we have seen the LAST of Miley. lol
Have a great weekend!!!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Moma's Big Day!

For several days, Moma has wanted me to call "Dorothy" which we know by now is Sherry. She wants Sherry to call Dinah at the beauty shop to get her an appointment. Obviously, I don't have sense enough to call the beauty shop and do away with the middle Dorothy. She went all into details about getting her hair cut and getting perm, blah-dy blah-dy, blah.....Then she begins the old tirade of needing her some money. Yada yada yada......Well, it just so happens that Sherry (a.k.a. Dorothy) contracted the stomach virus thingy from the pits of hell. Now anyone who knows me knows that I will run from a throw-upy thing like a maniac. So I told Sherry to stay as far away from my house as the east is from the west. I asked her not to even look toward my house or think about happy times here until she is well and virus free for at least 48 hours. So, that left me to deal with this beauty shop dilemma.Got up this morning and called the beauty shop. Finally got someone on my second attempt. Yes, they said to bring her on, they'd work her in. She was thrilled. So she began asking what she should wear. Now, get the visual. This little woman has ALWAYS dressed fit to kill. And she wears stockings, not panty hose. Something has to hold up those stockings (and that would be her girdle, BUT! she wears a pull-up type diaper). Now, when she wets herself (and she will), how is she going to change all that garb without completely disrobing at the beauty shop? So, brilliant me, I suggest that she wear one of her nice "house dresses" (thin housecoat), and her nicest pair of house slippers. She doesn't like it but I can tell she is thinking it over. So, I leave her alone, but notice her putting on her green suit, but the skirt keeps falling to the floor. After saying a few expletives, she gets out her new "house dress". I go in her room and she says, what kind of shoes am I going to wear? I got her house slippers and she flipped out. So, you get the picture......this was dragging on ad nauseum, so I washed my hands and left her. Now remember: Dinah is waiting on her. Plus, she was trotting to the bathroom between cussing, and changing clothes. Finally I went in to rush her along, and pulled out her black suit. I pinned the skirt, and begged her to get with it. She was looking for her glasses which she NEVER wears. Then she wanted some mints (I had none). She was in her jewelry box, in her closet, looking for her "pocket book", hunting kleenex. You'd have thought she was never going to come home.We finally get in the car, after my near coronary. I took her in and was prepared to stay with her, but Dinah said, "No, we'll be fine". I couldn't get out of there fast enough! (Big smile!)I know I have drug this on, so here is the end. When they finished with her, she told Becky not to call me because I was not at home! She wanted to stay! I got down there to pay her bill and pick her up and she wouldn't go. I left and went to Wally World, and then picked her up. She was at the beauty shop from 9:50 to 2:30! Could this be my new daycare??????One last funny....tonight when I got home from school, she was in her bed with her hot pink sleep cap on (which is 9 miles too big) and my AUBURN jacket!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Precious!