Rainy and Dreary....

Today has been rainy and dreary...well, tonight was rainy, but it has been dreary all day! Days like this seem to make Moma very confused.
Tonight, she had no clue who she lived with. She couldn't believe that she had a room here. She referred to her electric blanket control as her radio. She searched for her teeth for about 30 minutes. She took her back scratcher to the dogs (to spank them).
I got up to take a bath and she started following me, like a child. She wanted a cookie. We got her a cookie. Then, she wanted something to drink. I brought her a drink and she said, "This ain't no cookie!" I had to bite my tongue. I said, "The cookie is in your other hand, this is your drink!" But the precious thing she did next....I am just relaxing in my tub (have just gotten in and laid back). She begins trying to get in the bathroom. I finally sit up and say (loudly) "Moma, I am in here". She said, in her "sweetest" voice......"GET OUTTA THERE AND TURN ON SOME HEAT!!" Yes, it's true, I live in a zoo.

This is Moma!

This is the last Christmas that she was REALLY Moma. This is Christmas 2006. She was beginning to slip a bit then, but she was still my precious little Moma. Is she not cute as a bug?

Prayer Request

I found a wonderfully enlightening website about dementia today. Here is the link:

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/dementias/detail_dementia.htm#1033319213

One part I read said:

People with moderate and advanced dementia typically need round-the-clock care and supervision to prevent them from harming themselves or others. They also may need assistance with daily activities such as eating, bathing, and dressing. Meeting these needs takes patience, understanding, and careful thought by the person's caregivers.
and
The emotional and physical burden of caring for someone with dementia can be overwhelming. Support groups can often help caregivers deal with these demands and they can also offer helpful information about the disease and its treatment. It is important that caregivers occasionally have time off from round-the-clock nursing demands. Some communities provide respite facilities or adult day care centers that will care for dementia patients for a period of time, giving the primary caregivers a break. Eventually, many patients with dementia require the services of a full-time nursing home.

So....if you are a praying person, please pray specifically for these things:
1. My sanity (seriously).
2. For Moma to have peaceful and COMPLETE rest at night (which means peace for my household). Now all the information I have read says that this won't happen, but MY GOD is bigger than dementia. HE can make that happen.
3. Ask God to give us as a family what we need to survive. I am taking 3 post graduate classes with many demands and deadlines. I just had roots of a tooth (former root canal and crown) dug out of my jaw which I think is infected or dry socket or something (very painful). Adult child just moved back home, and needs a job. Youngest child facing college (decisions about school, major, apt., etc. In other words...$$$), I am anemic and I have another UTI (so I feel like crap). Husband has stressful job, and he is a heart patient. All this and I work full time. Complaining? no....like I said, I know MY GOD can handle it. And I know HE will. Am I asking for a vacation? No, just a little break here and there, peace in my home, and sleep. I live by Phil. 4:6.

Thank you for being so faithful to walk with me in this journey I'm on. I am writing for Moma, me and you. You are my support group.

Family Reunion

Okay, I promise to keep this short, but I just have to post this one! I was emailing a friend (Hi Jane), and I could hear Moma in the next room talking more than usual. So I began to really listen. She was giving some kind of speech at our family reunion. She was welcoming family and telling everyone they needed to love their kinfolks and so on. She also said we were going to have a service as a family. Then she began to line people up for pictures. She called the Oden family to come have their picture made. She asked if anyone had a camera to take these family pictures. Then she told them not to rush because some people couldn't move that fast. Then she began to plan next year's reunion and I am afraid she was planning to have it up here. She said, "We'll need plenty of room for everybody" and then volunteered that we have plenty of room here. In case you didn't know, my grandmother has NEVER been in charge of anything in her life! (Well in my lifetime anyway!) She is way to high maintenance herself to be in charge of anything. I just thought it was so cute the way she was talking about it. Then she said, "WHATEVER YOU'RE GIVING AWAY, I WANT ONE!!!!!" and it was over. zzzzzzzzzzsnorezzzzzzzzzzzsnorezzzzzzz
Happy Weekend!

How about this?

Moma is in the process of morphing out another personality. Now, the triplets will soon be quadruplets. The nursing home cannot hold the all the kids, so I guess they'll be with me until Jesus comes or I die, because we all know she will outlive me!

Latest escapades......(I'm in no mood for a long post; just had a tooth DUG out of my mouth, a major mass of stuff due for school, and I feel awful):

1. Wiped herself (on the bedside potty) and tossed the soiled paper into the floor. I told her to pick it up, and she said, "NO", so I leaned her over by the arm to force her to do it, and she kicked it under the bed. I popped that little arm like she was 5 (and she is only 4).
2. Told Christopher that she "didn't give a damn what he said".
3. Asked me how to get in touch with the store (and I asked what store). She said "Penney's I guess". When I inquired why she needed to call them, she said "to find out about paying them for all that stuff I bought".
4. Stuck her tongue out at me, and mocked me.
5. Trying to shock her out of the MILEY mode, I threatened her with the N word (nursing home), her response: GO TO IT!
6. Refusing to take her medicines. Refusing to eat. Being a jackass in general about stupid stuff.
7. At 2:00 am Wednesday morning, the house was on fire.
8. Keeps asking me about my brother (I have none).
9. Refers to Kerry as my Daddy.
10. Opened the door today, and let the dogs OUT! (My house dogs only go out on a leash).

Stayed tuned to WKRZE for more Looney Tunes.

My Turn

Sunday was my turn to go to church. Kerry and I split it up so we don't both miss or one of us miss all the time. Anyway, today was my turn, and I got up and got ready. I left her eating breakfast. When I came in from church, Kerry greeted me with "Boy, I have had a day!". He said Moma came to him and asked for some pads. He tried to explain to her that she doesn't use those anymore, that she wears those "pants" (Depends). She argued and argued, but he told her to keep those on until I got home. Then she asked for a "slop jar" because she has some kidney problems. He took her to her bedroom and showed her the bedside potty. She said, "Oh is that what that is?" So, after his tales of her morning escapades, I went down the hall to check on her. She was sitting naked as the day she was born (with the exception of blue fuzzy house shoes) on the toilet wringing her hands. The bathroom floor was soaking wet and her "pants" were in the floor. Precious. While trying to clean her up, I picked up the Depends from the floor and she snatched it and slung it (remember it was SOAKED, so you-know-what went everywhere) into the bathtub. Give me strength.
Sunday night, she came into the den, and yelled, "WHAT ARE Y'ALL DOING IN MY HOUSE?" Sweet.
Lord, give me what I need to endure this. As she used to say, "Lord, what I can't enjoy, let me endure".

Back Track

Forgive me for the back track, but I simply must report on Friday. It was a day of craziness.

I awoke a bit late and hit the floor running. I won't bore you with those details, but just know that everything that could go wrong, did. I wasn't ready to get Moma up for breakfast until 6:40 which is about 20 minutes later than usual. As I normally do, I went into her bedroom, turned off her lamp, and called out to her to wake up and come eat breakfast. I try not to startle her because she startles me when she jumps and hollers, plus the dog barks at me if I am too loud or if I make her jump. She would shake her head and say "Okay" but her eyes were not open. I repeated this MANY times, and finally went over to her, and touched her, so she jumped and hollered and the dog nearly bit me. I began trying to get her house shoes on her, but she kept holding up her leg and dropping it. I finally got them on, and helped her sit up, but she was like rubber. If I hadn't known better, I'd thought she was sloppy drunk. I finally got her to the table. She couldn't sit up straight, kept falling over sideways. She couldn't find her mouth with the spoon, and took her meds like she was paralyzed. I'd say, "Eat your oatmeal" and she'd say, "Whur?". Then I thought, Oh my gosh, she has gone blind! I called the school to let them know that I would be late because she was not cooperating. Back to the table for more madness. I finally called my sister and said, "GET DOWN HERE". When she arrived, she begin to ask Moma to do little things like lift her arm, and put her hand to her mouth. But she'd do it but hold it there like a DRUNK! Sherry said, "Do you know me?" Moma said, "Who are you?" She said, "I'm Sherry, your grandaughter". She said, "Good to know you". Sherry said, "What is your name?" Moma said, "I ain't got one". Sherry said, "Yes, your name is Mildred". She got this briar eating grin on her face, and just laughed, then said, "Well, HELLO Mildred!" and laughed some more. It was at this point that we knew we were either going to the doctor's office or the ER. So we get her up to change her and put on some fresh clothes. To keep from being too graphic, just let me say that after her bathroom visit, we suspected another UTI. So off to the doctor we went. (Wow, this is a long post!) You have to know that Moma always "shows out" at the doctor's office because to her, it is very important that you get a good "report card". She says that she is fine, and nothing hurts, and well...you get the idea. They took us right back, and got a specimen, then put her into a room. She told them she felt fine, and no it did not burn to go to the bathroom. (sigh) Anyway, she has a RAGING UTI again. And they make old people crazy as an outhouse rat. All the way home, she begged to go out to eat. SHE WAS IN HER GOWN AND HOUSECOAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We reminded her of that, and she said, "I don't care". We got her home, and Sherry chose to stay with her. I got to school at 11:30 on the nose! Whew! There is more to tell, but I am bushed. Stay tuned.

The Dog May Never Forgive Me

Today I decided to trim my Pekinese's hair. So I took him out on the back steps and started cutting. He was matted in a few places, and this was taking a bit longer than I anticipated, so I decided to get out the clippers. Now, I clip his hair in the summer, so I know how. I am not good by any means, but I get the job done. So, anyway, to do this, we needed to move to the deck. In the process of getting it all ready, Moma decides to come out to watch. She began her usual grunting in rhythm, then it began to be growls. It normally doesn't bother me as bad as it does the rest of the family, but today it was like fingernails you know where. The more she growled the more I clipped. So now the dog looks like a summer hair cut gone bad. I tried to straighten it up but it kept getting worse. She kept saying, "Cut it some more" and "He looks better, but you need to cut more". I was gritting my teeth and biting my tongue. When I finally gave up, she looked at him and said, "She shagged you up!" I wanted to throw my 94 year old grandmother off the deck into the yard below.

Later, I'll post yesterday's coo-coo for cocoa puffs adventure to the doctor. I need to apologize to the dog now.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day to my 2 readers! You know who you are! And I would like for us to get together to eat this weekend! Call me......:)

Well, life at my house has taken another turn in the road. My son has moved home. Now my daughter and husband are threatening to leave. Sigh............(note to self: this too shall pass)

Just a dabbling of the latest events in the life of the tripets. I am a little down, so the post will be short.
1. Caught her standing in the middle of my bathroom in the pitch darkness, diaper in the corner, gown up and holding toilet paper between her legs in a puddle of pee.....barefooted. Fun! (Make yourself mentally clean that up!)
2. While making "goodies" for Valentine's Day, she sat at the table nibbling on one of the cookies we gave her, begging like a child for more. "Please........please......give me one.....please.....please" and this went on for the entire time we were cooking!!!!!!!!!!!
3. Opened my Valentine from Kerry, then shoved random things into the envelope with the card. Asked Seth for part of his candy that I gave him (of course, he gave it all to her).
4. Continually asks us if we have already eaten breakfast (at 5:00 pm).
5. Took her food outside the other night to "feed the chickens".

Just a few typical events in the life of Mildred, Millicent, and Miley. I keep reminding myself of what good writing material she is giving me, because NO ONE could make this stuff up!

Mildred, Millicent, and Miley

Unfortunately, the twins have mutated into triplets. We have:
Mildred-knows us, knows who she is and where she lives, knows she has money and a "bank book", demanding, smart alec (YES!), feeds the dogs in a sneaky way, spiteful, walks steady and with a purpose, busy, bossy, and "helpful" (also, will attempt to send you on a guilt trip in a NY minute)
Millicent-Lost as a goose, very humble and sweet, thankful for everything you do for her, offers you anything she has including money (that she doesn't have), very weak and feeble, sleeps a lot, also does "other stuff" a lot, nasty, wants a bite of everything you eat, doesn't know us but knows she lives with us, feeds the dogs everything she can get her hands on, grunts and growls, says "Help me" often, tolerable but must be watched for her safety, repeats the same question or conversation over and over
Miley-CRAZY AS AN OUTHOUSE RAT, has night spells (does crazy things in the night), swipes things around the house for her own, changes clothes and puts dirty things back in the drawers, leaves the water running in every sink, empties her trash (with wet diapers) in everyone else's garbage can instead of big one outside, NASTY! leaves major messes in the bathroom (enough said), rubs herself with random potions all over the house (caught her with my facial scrub attempting to soothe a strained orafice (sorry), hoards things like straws, candy, kleenex, toilet paper, etc., talks out of her head, and has NO clue who we are or where she is
Sad, huh? Just part of the wonderful world of living to be 94. Ain't modern medicine wonderful?

Tossing French Fries with a twist of Insurance?

Today has been strange to say the least. Moma woke up seemingly normal (for her at this juncture), ate her oatmeal, grunted a few bars, then went back to bed. I did a little house cleaning and laundry. She woke up when the vacuum cleaner started. She began to "get in the way" as she tends to do when you need to finish something. As I was vacuuming the den, I heard her in the refrigerator rambling. I stopped and went in to tell her that I would fix lunch soon, so not to eat anything. She looked at me as if I had two heads, and went right on rambling. So, I stopped what I was doing, and began to fix her lunch. The phone rang and I wasn't paying her any attention, she went back to bed and was snoring when her lunch was ready!! I was ready to scream!!! I got her up and fed her. Making sure she had everything she needed before I poured milk on the cereal I was eating for lunch (Special K Chocolately Delight...my new fav) because I refuse to be interrupted eating my cereal because I hate soggy flakes. Okay, it seemed safe. I poured the milk. "Did you put butter on this?" I sigh, get up and get the butter. Only lost seconds, maybe they are still crisp. "Is the salt on the table?" Completely undone now, I push back my chair and get up and get the salt. Back to my cereal.....soggy flakes (sigh). She doesn't care. She got what she wanted. SIDEBAR: IF YOU THINK I AM JUST BEING MEAN, REMEMBER FROM AN EARLIER POST I SAID THAT SHE HAS ALWAYS BEEN A PRINCESS; EXPECTING HER WAY ALL THE TIME, NO EXCEPTIONS! She finishes her meal, and gets up to go to the bathroom. I know she'll be in there for an eon, so I clean up the dishes, and go get my swiffer mop thingy. I am busy as a beaver mopping up the nasty kitchen floor because she is the queen of spills, and my floor could grow potatoes from all the dirt and grime. I am about to be almost finished and she appears at the door. "Dear, could you get me this much drink (holding up two fingers about 2 inches apart)?" Instead of arguing, I go to the cabinet, get out a cup, and draw a bit of water out of the refrigerator door. I hand it to her, and she replies, "This is only enough for a sip or two". I am about to lose it at this point. I bellow, "If you will let me finish mopping, I'll fix you any amount of any thing you want! I am busy!" To which she replies, "I'm sorry I bothered you", and strolls off attempting to make me feel guilty. My subconcious is screaming...."You don't care anything about me or how hard I am working to make this arrangement work. You only care about YOU!" Instead, I just sigh. (I do that a lot). I am setting you up to see how strange the day has been.
Later on, I am getting ready to go to the grocery store. Sherry comes in and I am getting ready to leave. I warn Sherry that she is the demanding, smart alec twin today. We have appropriately named that twin Mildred. As I am leaving, she is yelling at me to give her back her checkbook.
Sherry said that Mildred remained for about 30 minutes, and all of a sudden, Millicent, the confused demented twin appeared. She wanted to know who all was her family, and who all was dead, and who would take care of distributing her things when she died. She kept saying "Who knows about my insurance?" About 1 1/2 hours later, I return. She is still Millicent, but a sadder version. She is lost and worried about being left alone. She wants us to know that everything at Forrest Cemetary is paid for. We laugh and say, "we know", and tongue in cheek say "Everything but the opening and closing of the grave, the engraving, the casket, the funeral, the flowers, etc. because she has NO life insurance and NO money!!) She told us 50 time that everything was made out to us, and we'd handle the insurance. We told her she didn't have any, to no avail. She kept saying insurance, but we later figured out she meant the burial policy, which won't pay for much of anything. After much craziness, she went to lie down.
Guess who woke up? You got it! MILDRED! Mean and nasty. At supper, I went to open her take out for her, and she started hollering, "I didn't order all those french fries". I took 3/4 of them off her plate to shut her up. When I sat down to eat, she chunked 1/2 of them onto my plate! I know that it sounds silly, but at that moment, I wanted to push her backward in that chair and mash those fries in her face! Refer back to the post called Food Fight if you are lost. I am one of those people who cannot tolerate people messing in my things, especially my food!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope tomorrow is better. It's my day to stay home with her. Kerry gets to go to church this Sunday. Maybe only one twin will show up. I can't take both of them in the same day!

"She ignores me"

Yesterday, Moma kept telling me, "She ignores me" referring to my daughter, Rebekah. I kept on telling her that she is just a teenager and that is how teenagers act, not to take it personally. Well, Moma is constantly hollering out at people as they pass by her room (even the dogs...), so as I headed to the basement, she hollered, "HEY! WHERE ARE YOU GOING???" So, I had to turn around, and tell her (and you don't tell her once, you repeat it several times to her "Huh?"). Later, I was at the computer and Moma was in the bathroom. Rebekah came through, and she yells out, "HEY! Where are you going? (no response) HEY! I said, where are you going?" Now Rebekah claims that she did not hear her, but anyway....I heard Moma say to herself, "I know it ain't none of my business, and to be honest, I don't give a damn where you are going or what you do". I about fell out of my chair. You never know what she will say. Note to self: do not take her to church at this point.

Would like to congratulate Jerrell Harris on his signing with the University of Alabama today (although I had so hoped he'd sign with Auburn). He and Bek have gone to school together since Kindergarten. I have sense enough to know he'll never read this, but he is just another kid that I am proud of! What a great kid! I have enjoyed watching you grow up, Jerrell!

Whistling Girls...

Erin, my great niece, and Moma's great great grandchild (the first) has learned to whistle. She was up here whistling the other night, and it reminded us of a story Moma used to tell us. When she was a little girl, she had an old maid aunt named Henrietta (Aunt Henri). She was mean and nasty and bitter toward the world, and Moma was a mischieveous little girl who knew what buttons to push to really send Aunt Henri over the edge. Anyway, I digress, Moma used to love to go aroud whistling. One day (and many days after), Aunt Henri said, "Whistling girls and crowing hens always come to some bad end!" Moma loved to hate Aunt Henri!

Not much to report this week. She has had a few episodes, but mostly good days. She seems to be less "social" during the wee hours of the morning (thank goodness), but she seems to be sleeping more.
Stay tuned....she's due.

How many times is it now?

This morning, I let Moma sleep late. At 9:00, I woke her and fed her breakfast. "What day is this?" she asks, as she does every morning. I answer, "Saturday". She nods. I give her her morning meds. "Is today Wednesday?" she wants to know. I answer, "Saturday". She nods. When she finishes eating, she gets up to go to the bathroom. "What is today?" she asks. "Moma, it is Saturday", I answer. "oh" is all she says. I leave for the grocery store.
Lunch time ( a later lunch due to the later breakfast), I call her to eat. "Is today Sunday?" she asks. "No, today is Saturday", I call back to her, returning to the kitchen to finish her lunch. She comes to the table. "And today is Saturday?". I nod. She eats her lunch, watching to see if I am watching her trying to feed my dogs. I correct her (she hates when she gets caught). "What day is this?" again, she asks. "Saturday", I mumble tired of answering the same question. "What?" she asks. "SATURDAY" I say in a louder voice.
You get the idea. Today, I decided just for kicks to keep count. She asked 12 times about what the day of the week was before I tired of this game. Kerry and I went out to eat, and I told my sister to keep count. She saved that for me. All she asked Sherry was, "Where did Julie and Kerry go?" She asked me again what the day was when we got home.
It is so sad to not have a clue not only what day it is, but not know that you have asked that 25 times. I can lose track of the days during the summer when I am out of school, but I don't keep forgetting it. I do finally figure it out. We take our youth for granted. I am learning to live life every day to the fullest. Stop sweating the small stuff that does not count. Things that used to drive me crazy are now just a part of our daily routine. Wow, look at me, I am finally becoming a mature adult (well, let's don't get carried away, adult maybe, but mature? never!)
As I gave Moma her bedtime medicine and bid her goodnight, her last words of the day to me were...."Tomorrow is Sunday?". Yes, Moma, tomorrow is Sunday. Goodnight.