Sunday, January 31, 2010

Large and In Charge

This morning Moma woke up large and in charge. I woke up to the sounds of her opening the dogs' crates and freeing them and the cats. Then she went into the kitchen. I let the dogs out and went to the bathroom. When I returned, she had 2 muffins she had swiped out of the oven (left over from yesterday) with a panic look on her face. She was frantically trying to put them in the microwave, but couldn't open the door. She was so afraid I was going to take them away from her. I did take them and put them on a plate, and then put them in the microwave. I started making her oatmeal, and she said, "They ain't made no coffee yet". (Who is they?) Keep in mind I had just woken up, I do not speak for at least 20-30 minutes. She told me to turn the light off that I had turned on over the sink. She began to boss me about her medicine. And "Did you put any butter in that?" and on and on. She even forced the poor cats outside (they went out resisting all the way). I hate the days when she thinks she in charge of me! I'm more one of those if-you'll-leave-me-alone-I'll-do-it-all-myself! I like my status-quo!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Quick Exit

So, the sitter met me at the door today with her coat on and her purse on her arm. I figured it had been a bad day. She reported that Moma had been a horse's hind end all day. Nice.

Last night, she woke me up at 3 am whining that she was freezing and had "caught a chill". I have never understood that terminology. She took on like someone had doused her with a Gatorade cooler of ice water. I turned her around and took her back to her room. She stumbled and weaved like a drunk. When we got into her room, she sat on the edge of her bed, leaned over and clutched her legs wailing about being cold. At this point, I will admit, I wanted to kill her. I walked around the bed, made sure her electric blanket was on, and then barked at her to lie down. I covered her up, and she kept saying that I could do that all I wanted but it wasn't going to help. What the crap? I went back to bed WIDE AWAKE. When I got still, I could hear her moaning and wailing. "Jesus! Help me, Jesus! I'm freeeeeezing, Jesus! Help me! JESUUUUUUUS! Oh Jesus...." I got up, went into her room and hollered "Hey! Shut that up, I have to work tomorrow!" She never missed a lick. She continued to carry on, so I slammed her door shut and begged God to take her home!
Needless to say, I woke up 45 minutes late. Ugh....

Monday, January 25, 2010


Moma woke up from her "after supper nap" in a foul mood. I was in the bathtub (of course, she always gets up when I am in there). She banged on the bathroom door and demanded that I put the cats up in their crates (yes, my cats are crate trained). Then I heard her swinging her cane at all my animals. When I got out, she had her door barricaded, and poor ShuShu was under my bed. Awww......

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Hung Up

Today we are hung up on asking the same question over and over. She has asked what day it is a jillion times(Sunday). She can't remember where Kerry is (Gulf Shores). That little white car belongs to Rebekah (I've said that at least 25 times). It has really been bad today. I know it doesn't sound like much but once you've answered 1 question 5 or 6 times, you would get the idea. She has a whole host of things she asks on a regular basis. AND the answer must be repeated at the very least once. She is so hard of hearing, but part of that is habit! And the fact that she has selective hearing. I've gotten to where I start repeating it once I've said it the first time, before she asks.
With Kerry gone, Rebekah and I have stayed in our jammies all day and watched home movies and thankfully, most of the day she has napped (as she does on rainy days).

Saturday, January 23, 2010


Nothing really exciting to report. Since November '07 I can tell she has gone down in a lot of ways, but in others, not really. Hard to decipher. As usual on a cloudy dreary day, she feels so bad, and has gone back to bed.
She seems to be shrinking in size to me. I looked at her sitting at the breakfast table this morning and thought that she looked like a child sitting there.
Only God knows why she has lived this long and when her journey home will be.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Good walking shoes

Okay, so I got home this afternoon and my great niece was here for me to help her with her project. So....after doing the essentials, I settled down to the laptop at the table in the den. Moma was up roaming around. I kept sending Erin to check on her. Finally, I said, "Get in here and sit down. I have to help Erin and I cannot be up chasing you too". So, she chose the chair right next to me at the table. If you know me, you know that the minute I sit down, I kick off my shoes. I wasn't really paying Moma any attention, but she asked a million questions, kept rubbing her hand up and down my leg and patting me on the back.In a minute, I heard her say, "I'll bet these are goooooood walking shoes!" I looked down to see Precious wearing my Berkenstocks! Lovely......

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Happy Birthday Dear Junior.....

Today is Kerry's birthday, so tonight at supper Rebekah asked Moma to sing to him. She asked him what his name was, and of course, he gave her a goofy answer. "Junior" he said. So she sang Happy Birthday to Junior. It was great! We recorded it. I am in the process of putting it on my podcast. Kerry got a Nat. Champ. hat from Bek, so he put it on her head. Precious!

Saturday, January 16, 2010


Note: The podcast thing is beginning to get on my nerves, and I hit stop every time I tune in, but I am working on it. Be patient. If I can't get it fixed like I want, I may delete it and just put the link up.

Yesterday when I got in from school, it being Friday, I was adding up hours and doing math (ugh) so I could pay Connie (new sitter). Connie was on the phone in the other room with her son. Moma entered the kitchen, "Julie......Julie.....she said she bought me some candy but you won't let me have it." I tried to just ignore this. "Where is that candy? Huh?" refusing to be ignored, she continued. "Moma, I do not know what you are talking about. Wait until Connie gets off the phone and we'll ask her".
When Connie got off the phone, she explained that she had told Moma she could not have the whole bag because she feeds the animals, and I don't like that. She gave her 3 pieces and made her sit at the table and eat them, but of course, the Princess wanted the whole bag. I reminded her that she forgets and feeds candy to the dogs and it makes them sick, so she cannot have the whole bag. I turned back to my math and check writing duties when I heard, "Y'all make me sick accusing me of feeding those dogs. I don't feed them!" Connie and I both said at the same time, "Yes, you do." She screeched "LIARS!" So, I calmly said, "Hush" and was about to turn back to the check book when she said, "Y'all are so hateful about me and food. I don't feed them dogs. Y'all are just telling a big lie on me". Connie was talking, I was talking and Moma was screeching. It was a precious moment. Finally, I said, "SHUT YOUR MOUTH or get out of here!". She started walking off and said, "Y'all can both kiss my ass" and then turned to Connie and said, "Ram it up your ass". Isn't that sweet? Love it. She went toward the living room to look out the door, and Connie followed her. She pointed her cane in Connie's face and screamed "GET!". She then went to her room, got in her bed, and covered her head with the blanket.
In a little bit, she got up and started toward me really fast saying, "Is it too late for me to go?" I tried to ignore this as well. "HUH?" I glanced her way. "Is it too late for me to go?" "Where are you going Moma?" She looked at me like I had two heads, and then said, "I was supposed to go somewhere this afternoon....is it too late?" I just nodded my head yes. "Yes m'am. It's too late".
BUT THEN......UGH.......I AM STILL BITTER! CAN YOU TELL? I WAS DRESSING TO ATTEND REBEKAH'S OPERA AT JSU. SHE STOOD IN THE DOOR WATCHING ME VERY CLOSELY.....THEN....IN A GROWLING LIKE VOICE, SHE SAID.........."GOOD GRACIOUS!!!! I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WAS SO FAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Couldn't dislike her more than I did at that moment. I have gained weight! I am huge! I weigh more than I did when I was pregnant with my last child. I am sick to my stomach over it. "Thanks" was all I said, but my thoughts might send me to Hell.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Let me lick that pan

Tonight, I was scooping out the remains of last night's supper for my lunch tomorrow while Moma had one of her many night time visits to the kitchen for something to drink. Hunched over, she toddled over to where I stood, and said, "What is that?" I said, "last night's supper". She said, "Lemme lick that pan". She sat and ate cold chicken casserole until the pan was clean. Ugh.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Bom Bom Bom!

As I post, I am listening to Moma jibber and jabber on the monitor. Then she does this "bom bom bom...." in a musical manner. It is like she is singing with the sound effects of drums. Her speech is so slurred tonight I cannot understand all the chatter. She is not angry, like usual. She is just carrying on a conversation with someone...too bad I cannot understand any of it.
Tonight's post is short. I am tired. I am weary. I am in serious need of a road trip.
At supper tonight, Moma was so curious about the salads I fixed Kerry and me. We all had soup, but she hates salad, so I didn't fix her one. When I sat down, she leaned in and said, "I'm gonna order me a salad and eat alllllll that, except the lettuce." Okay....define salad.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

The Day from Hell

To say that Moma has been awful today would be an understatement. I'd like to know how many times I've said that in this blog. But today....ugh. I wanted to kill her several times. REALLY!
First of all, for the past few days, my sister has been the Madonna, the precious gift from Heaven. She has asked for her over and over. "Well, where has Sherry been? I miss her!" and on and on.
But today, she has been more than crabby.
She and Rebekah got into it at lunch over feeding the dogs. (What else?) She started hollering at Rebekah, and Bek told her to hush. She promptly replied, "Make me!" When Rebekah left the kitchen, she said, "Shit-ass" Rebekah said, "I heard that". Moma said, "Good, I'm glad you did." and blew her a kiss!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I went to Wal-Mart and brought her back a Reese's Cup. I thought she was going to dance. She said, "Goody goody!! You're gone let me have some candy!!"
Sherry and Erin came by for me to help Erin with a project on the computer. Moma couldn't get enough of Sherry. But when Sherry talked to me, instead of her, she turned around and screeched, "TURN THIS TV ON SOMETHING BESIDES FOOTBALL!!" Then she called to Erin to go to the bathroom and see if Kerry was in there. Then she asked what day it is, what time it is, and asked Sherry if she had seen the people that lived here. Lovely.
But the final straw....Kerry came home with our pizza (where he was gone when she thought he was in the bathroom), she looked at her piece and said, "This is the sorriest something to eat I've ever had". Here is the rule about pizza. Don't count her in because she hates it. BUT, just try to fix her something different, and not offer her a piece of pizza. She will get mad and then beg for a piece like a child. Tonight, she moaned and whined and complained about the pizza. She acted awful until I finally unloaded on her. I mean I let her have it. Her response? "Forgive me". I HATE THAT!!! Kerry laughed, but I could not despise her more at this very moment.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Snow Day

We got a snow day today! To be honest, I didn't want one (but took it willingly). I'd prefer my "off" days to be in the spring when it is warm with blue skies!
Moma has been very passive today. She has stayed in the bed a good bit. She keeps telling me that she doesn't feel good, and every time she says that, I kind of poo-poo it away because she says it every day. BUT....I know she has gone down a good bit in the last year. She only weighs 90 pounds. I know she may not be with us much longer and every meal we eat together could be her last. I am trying hard to not resent her for taking my freedom. I am trying to answer her, making eye contact, so she can hear me. I am really trying.....

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Never take it for granted

Tonight was my Wednesday night to go to church. I called the church to make sure service had not been canceled due to this freezing weather and threat of snow (Brr...). We have a new pastor, and I had made a solemn promise to myself (and God) that when we got a pastor, I would go back to Wednesday night prayer service on my night. My heart was blessed. The minute I sat down, my heart began to fill up. My eyes were getting teary. Then Bro. Jay delivered the greatest Bible study on the 10 Commandments, and shared some insights that I had never thought of or heard before. I felt so blessed just being in God's house. I am so looking forward to being able to go "every time the door opens" again. I am ready to work in church again. I love my Sunday School class, but promised the Lord that when I can come back, I'll do whatever He wants me to do (which I am so afraid will involve children again, but Hey! I will be his vessel.) My main thought in this post is that I want to seriously urge you to NEVER take your simple daily freedoms for granted. I cannot even run to the store without making arrangements, as someone has to be with Moma all the time. Embrace your freedom and GO TO CHURCH every chance you get!
When I got home, Moma was standing in the kitchen looking really confused. She said, "There you are." I said, "What? You knew I went to church. Where is Kerry?" She said, "He ain't here, nobody is. Do you know anything about the others?" I said, "Who Moma?" She answered, "Kerry or Sherry...." As it turns out, Kerry was in the bathroom. lol And for some reason, she keeps expecting Sherry to be here. lol I promptly handed her the "bedtime" meds.

Monday, January 4, 2010


If you are a long time reader, then you have heard about the built in radar Moma has when it comes to you sneaking food. But there is another type radar that needs addressing. This has really become a problem lately.
You know how you can catch something on the news and suddenly want to tune in to it? OR how you plan your evening so that you can watch your favorite show after everything has been accomplished?
NO MORE! Thanks to Moma's newly developed radar.
Just try to watch a TV show or listen to a newscast in her presence. She will call your name, ask random questions, or request something from you just as soon as you zone in. And this does not stop with one interruption. She'll pause, make you think she is finished, just long enough for you to zone in again. And Bingo! She is running that mouth again. Never fails.
At least she continues to develop new irritations on a fairly regular basis so there is no chance of getting bored with the old ones. Sad thing though, she never stops the old ones. She just adds to them.