Random

I am not a good patient. I would never pass the test to be a part of this royal family. I do not want anyone waiting on me. I cannot stand having to depend on anyone for anything. Not being able to drive makes me nutty! Now, I'm not going to do anything that will stop the healing process or make things worse, but I just had to declare that this is ONE area that I am not like my grandmother. Something about that is comforting.

I warned you...

I warned you about multiple posts today.
Moma is so determined to make this her pity party. Sherry came by and brought her a card, and of course, I am saving mine for the cook-out with the inlaws so she won't feel left out then.
If she tells me one more time "I would've never known it was Mother's Day if someone hadn't told me" I'm gonna say.....
YOU WOULDN'T KNOW IT WAS SUNDAY IF I DIDN'T TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Mother's Day or is that MILDRED day?

Today may be a day of multiple posts. So far at 10:47, it has been a doozy. My sweet unnamed husband got up and fixed us biscuits. When Precious came to eat, she said, "Ain't you got no eggs?" Then after her many complaints of the coffee being only barely warm to too hot to just cold to LEAVE IT ALONE, she began to read the paper. "Julie....is this Mother's Day?" I nodded her direction and mumbled "uh-huh". Delighted, she perked up! "Oh I didn't know this was MY day!" (Yes, Moma because it is and always has been all about YOU).
Then she started. "I used to always look forward to Mother's Day! Horace (my dad) and Billie NEVER forgot Mother's Day!! (more rambling, then...) I don't reckon you and Sherry even RECOGNIZE Mother's Day" She had the meanest snarl on her face aimed right at me. Needless to say, the urge to kill was strongest at that exact moment. I took a deep breath, and remembered my sweet mother's ability to deal with the royalness of Moma and reminded her that I had just had surgery and wasn't able to go out and do much shopping but that we were going to have a little celebration at supper tonight. I assured her she had not been forgotten by me or Sherry! I can remember how she tormented my precious mother to the point she could not even enjoy her own Mother's Day.
Happy Mother's Day Ruby Lumpkin, the BEST mother a girl could have. You understood why boots had to be a certain color, and why only Skinny Dip would do. You slipped money to me when Daddy wasn't looking. You taught me so many things and I was an ungrateful little snot. Thank you for everything you did and didn't do. I hope your day in Heaven is as beautiful as the one here. I love you.

Saturday

Most people look forward to Saturdays....ahh....sleep late, be lazy, not do much of anything....HA! I loathe Saturdays! The person I can no longer mention plays golf all day, and my offspring do all of the above, but the princess???? Oh she gets up with the chickens! Raring to go! I awoke this morning to the sound of her door closing and that infamous clicking sound of her cane. She was ready to eat! (what else?)
I sprang (as much as a post op gal can) into action. I made the coffee, filled up her water glass, and started the water for her oatmeal. Inside my head I kept thinking "Was this what Dr. Newman and Dr Godfree meant by taking it easy?" She was rattling off all sorts of things she wanted from me, and I was really not listening. "JULIE" (I am now). In a sweet little voice, unlike the call of the wild I just heard, "Are you feeling better?" she asked. I nod, thinking to myself if she can remember I had surgery, why can't she remember what day it is. Without going into great detail, she wore me out at the breakfast table. She bossed and ordered like I wore an apron and expected a tip. I'm ready to go back to work!
Work...work....THAT'S IT! I could save the nation with this plan. Get the deadbeats getting disability (not the well deserved) back into the work force! They should somehow have to spend a mere week with this little princess. They would not be allowed to hurt her, but had to take care of her for one week 24/7. I mean, after only 2 days out of the hospital, I am ready to get back to my school and my students. My work ethic is healthy!

I'm Baaaaaak!

Just like I promised, here I am! Back to my blog, back to the only place I can say what frustrates me the most and no one judges me. (However, I was instructed by Mr. Payne to leave his name out of the blog from now on). The surgery went well. They were behind schedule but managed to get me worked in. lol I have no real memory of Monday except for the hours prior to surgery. Tuesday is a foggy blur. Wednesday's events are a little more clear, but fairly uneventful. In fact, my life was almost boring until I returned to this little brick rancher I call home. From the minute I arrived, Moma has been awful. It has to be about her and it wasn't, so she acted out to make sure it was about her.
As I lay in my bed today attempting to "rest", I was serenaded by Moma on the porch swing bellowing the A-men chorus. "A-men, AA-men, AAMENAMENAMEN!" All the while, my son was giving our fat chihuahua mix a bath because he was covered in red mud. The cats and I laid peacefully as possible on the bed, listening to the soloist outside. The bathroom door opened, and out ran the dogs (Shula had to watch). They raced down the way to my room but Tubby (the fat wet dog) took a detour, up on the love seat and sprung over onto the bed, where the cats jumped sky high, all 40 claws at knife like point, ran over my back and down my arm leaving 4 large nasty scratches. Moma never missed a note. And on my shoulder was a tiny barker announcing, "In this ring......" as circus music played in my head.
Some folks look forward to retirement. I just long for "normal".

Not doing what I think is right!

Okay...I am going against everything I believe in but I am not telling Moma about my surgery tomorrow. I do believe it is not the right thing to do, but oh, it will make my life so much easier! (until she finds out). I'm not telling my aunt either.....Shhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She has been really good today, which is a nice change from the past few weeks. So, other than that...there is not much to report.
I am signing off for a few days. If you are a praying person, lift me up. I'll be fine, I know. The Lord and I have had this discussion several times. He is in control! Pray for my family left to care for the little princess.

Flying Vanilla Wafers

If you are a faithful reader, you know that Moma has needed Time Out for the last several days. Today, she has been short and snappy with her answers and bossy to the 25th power. I was getting ready to go to the grocery store and she was snapping off what all she needed. I finally lost it and just walked out the door.
When I got home, she got up from her bed to come ramble through the grocery bags and ask a million questions. She kept telling the dogs that I didn't bring them anything. Then I caught her out of the corner of my eye. She was offering a vanilla wafer to Tubby. I got right in front of her and said, "You can put that in your mouth or in the trash, but you can NOT feed it to my dog!" She tried denying it at first, but knew she was caught. So she said, "I'll feed them anytime I get ready!" I said, "Okay, that is fine Missy! That bag of coconut candy your ordered me to buy will go right back to the store, and you won't get any!" She FLUNG the vanilla wafer at me and said, "There! Ram it up your ass!"
Again, how precious.