Decision made, no regrets

When I started this blog, I wanted it to be an honest portrayal of what it is like to have an elderly person live with you when living alone is no longer possible. I have not been completely honest. For privacy reasons, I have kept something from you for almost a week now.
Recently, an opening came up in a private care home, in my community. I was encouraged by many to take the opportunity to put Moma there, and un-burden my life. I made the call, I got the information. I shared it with my sister. Then I prayed. I called on some of my prayer warrior friends to help. I only asked that they pray that I make the right decision for Moma (not me). Several commented to me that they felt I should do this for my sanity; that I had done my part. I continued to pray. I pleaded with the Lord for a clear answer, a sign to know what to do. But as is His way (and the answer I hate), He said, "Wait". Wait for what? I pouted but continued pleading for His wisdom. While I was doing laundry Sunday, the answer begin to come to me. "Are you doing this for selfish reasons?" was the question that kept coming to mind. Long story short....the ONLY unselfish reason I was considering it was my precious husband's health. But after he assured me that he was not an issue, and for me not to even consider him as one; he was fine. "Okay Lord, you are right. It is about 95% for selfish reasons. "There is your answer", I felt Him say. Peace. I felt peace. God did not call me into this for ME. He asked me to sacrifice, but promised to meet my needs. He has. I am selfish. I want it all. That is NOT His plan for me. He does not call the equipped. He equips the called. I am called for this mission. Yes, I feel peace.